Sembra che le persone non aspettino altro che poter elargire consigli. Anche e soprattutto se non richiesti - i famosi consigli gratuiti - perchè in quel caso si sentono superiori e con la verità in tasca. Diversamente, se il consiglio venisse espressamente richiesto, aumenterebbe il senso di responsabilità per chi fosse chiamato a darlo e le conseguenze che implicherebbe il proprio parere potrebbero gravare sul "consigliere".
Io credo che in realtà convenga sempre farsi gli affari propri e non elargire consigli e/o consulenze fuori luogo a chi not explicitly request, because if someone needs advice goes in search of them and also the fundamental premise in case would be the presumption that the other has made mistakes, and consequently it is a priority to correct the mistake.
apart from that boundary, I consider far more significant than the other two aspects of the desirability of actively listening to the opinions of others.
I am convinced that it is vital that anyone who advises us and judge us in some way, be regarded by us, our personal opinion, a person above us, of great value, which we will can estimate that the other has a vision of the problem, free from bias and that takes into account primarily for our own good, or at least see things from a different angle. So a smart person .....
Second, but perhaps more importantly, is the cognitive aspect. Whoever you think you know someone in depth, know that you are wrong. Sure, many may be aware of objective data, aspects of the character or lifestyle choices of those who front, but deep in the soul and true essence of a person and what he really thinks and wants for herself, no one can know. Sometimes we can even claim to know really, we are faced with situations that push us to react as we would have never thought about it, also because I want to emphasize one thing to talk about in theory, the other is hot to make a decision, fully involved in person.
Now we understand how difficult it is to occur both conditions and this makes us very politely, we can choose to listen to the views of our partners, but without being too much influence and, above all mediating always, hopefully, with our intelligence.
Fatally one who gives a council has passed first to the last sacrament of the proceedings. Judgement is necessarily supported by his personal beliefs, convictions and experiences and not by chance that the classical expression that is used is "I, if I were you ....".
But what sense can never have everything? If he were in my place, in my situation, no doubt would act at its discretion, in line with his personality, but I'm something else .... Nor, may I, may be assumed to act as if my head and my character, for, repeat, his limited knowledge of myself and my inner world would prevent that.
Forgive me if this argument might seem insignificant, but the reason for my choice is that only by remaining immune to the need for approval and dependence on the judgments of others, gaining the ability to judge against in all spheres of life, from the sphere emotional than the reality of everyday life, can we realistically believe that it is not controlled or managed by others, the so-called friends in the whole system in general, what else does not wait to get the approval, and the annihilation of the ability to discern between good and evil.
assessment that, in any event, it is always and only to us.
SAYS TEST : Before judging or advising a man, walk a mile in his shoes.
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