For every love that is born there is a growing fear: the more we feel the new partners involved, the greater the fear in us that this story will only bring to great suffering.
frequently happens that at the beginning of a relationship there is one partner who torments him with insidious negative prophecies about the end of that story, he lives every day with the fear of failure, fear to live it fully the joy of the new relationship. The effect è solamente un’insicurezza paralizzante e una facilità maggiore che la storia si concluda tragicamente, a causa di quelle convinzioni catastrofiche che ci conducono inconsciamente a mettere in gioco la versione peggiore di noi stessi.
Nessuno di noi potrà mai avere la certezza che un amore durerà per sempre, ne’ all’inizio di una storia, ne’ dopo molti anni. Questo però non significa che non valga sempre e comunque la pena di vivere tutte le emozioni che il rapporto ci regala, indipendentemente da quando questi bei momenti si concluderanno. Chi ci dice, in fondo, che non saremo magari proprio noi a desiderare, un giorno, la fine di quel rapporto? Come facciamo ad be sure that when that time comes we will suffer more? It may happen, as can happen otherwise.
Each chooses its own partners, as well as a number of obvious reasons, also for its therapeutic potential.
We are naturally attracted to people by their character, their history, their behavior can be positive for us. For example, partners with life experiences similar to ours or character can understand each other better, make us feel less alone, if what you're looking for is support and a space of emotional sharing, or the extremes, which encourage us to grow, change, to take risks, to dissolve our fears or our blues.
In any healthy relationship partner should, among other things, help to give a part of us, as we help him on other fronts. This is why many couples work and many can not, beyond the physics of attraction, affection, or many other characteristics considered important. This possibility, this giving and receiving is present in every relationship, even in brief reports and even in parts minimum.
This does not mean that the story will last forever, but that always be worth living, because certainly bring something that "serves" and can teach us many things about ourselves and our inner world.
What we are, after all, is what we experienced.
Provided that they are always adventures hopeless or suicidal announced, "we must not live in the nightmare of trying to start a relationship or get involved by strong feelings, because behind them there is certainly something that at that time we need.
Here's what I love ... I am one of you that love is often left without a reason, but without great suffering, and that even now, being at an important crossroad, afraid.
hope, however, that in everything I've written some of you may be able to be reflected either that you really understand who you were or who you want on your side.
SAYS THE WISE: need is a bit like 'to understand, but be a bit' different to love each other.
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